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A young Catholic’s insights on a deeper, more virtuous life.

“The only people who are never bored are lovers.” 

If I had a dime for everytime I heard that line….

Is this “no” to sex outside of marriage some manipulative game to stop our desires and make us prudes who have no fun?

Here’s what the church has to say:

The commandment to refrain from sex looks out for the best interest of people. The Church is not trying to ban you from everything you want to do, but to tell you you were made to experience this great act in it’s all its glory free from manipulations, regrets, heartbreaks, feeling used, wounds, and disrespect.

The Church believes that this great act, designed by God, is what ‘seals the deal’ of a marriage. The body language in sex speaks for itself. It shows the value, sacredness, and glory that God has planned for such a sacrament of love. It shows that God wanted to bring two people together in love—so exclusively–that they get to share in an act together that is blissful, sacred, holy, bountiful, and specific to them and their love.

The Church calls marriage a sacrament ‘claiming’ it makes you holier and can even heal you.

“Marriage is a domestic church—an act of the will that signifies a mutual gift, which unites the spouses and binds them to their eventual souls.” –John Paul II

“through gestures and reactions, through the tension and enjoyment, the body in its action and interaction—allows the person to speak and express themselves in the fullest and most profound way possible.” –John Paul II

The church assures people that this act is prophetic—it is sacred, and holy.  It should glorify God and bring two people into a foreshadow of God’s ecstasy [which is love]. This union of two bodies and souls is one that represents, on Earth, the euphoria of the marriage we will one day have with God in Heaven.

The Church wants its people to pursue purity because pure, sensual pleasure is freeing because it includes deep desire, appreciation, care, and respect for the value of the person you’re with. Its a longing to be close with someone because when words alone are not enough, you have to show it with your body.  An entering into the mystery of another person and a pathway to love one person uniquely and exclusively.

They say that the anticipation of waiting for sex creates great appreciation and satisfaction in your sex life. And those who wait the longest, especially until marriage, have better communication and longer lasting marriages

The church is honest, hopeful, and real. She makes you think differently and all my devils-advocates out there can appreciate that, right?  The catchphrase of the year (the article title) breeds a minimalist view. That view shields our minds and stops us from opening the depths of our hearts because sometimes “rules” neglect to show that the point of following Christ is to stand for glorious habits that are worth more. Life with Christ should enliven everything we do (even sexual intimacy) not fear us away from what God  created and says is good.

So no, the Catholic Church shouldn’t get with the times because if it does, than it has stopped offering the human heart the most glorious plan for sexual intimacy ever offered. Instead, maybe culture should rid the pornified media and get to know the depths of this awesome act that God created.

“It’s not that the world glorifies sex, it’s that the world fails to see its glory.” –Jason Evert

Further reading:
O Happy Fault! -Bobby Angel
Good News About Sex & Marriage –Christopher West 
Love and Responsibility–John Paul II
Theology of the Body–John Paul II 



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